You say yes to keep the peace. You overcommit because saying no feels selfish. You put everyone else's needs ahead of yours, and then wonder why you're exhausted and resentful. Sound familiar?
Setting limits isn't about becoming cold or difficult. It's about getting honest with yourself and the people around you about what you actually have to give. This workbook walks you through the guilt, the fear of disappointing people, and the deep belief that your worth is tied to how much you do for others — and helps you dismantle all of it, one step at a time.
The Boundaries Scripts Toolkit inside gives you real words for real situations — with your mother-in-law, your boss, your best friend. No more rehearsing the same conversation in your head at 2am wondering what to say.
233 reviews
I finally know where my actual limits are
The first section makes you map your boundaries before you try to hold any of them. I'd been out there trying to enforce lines I'd never actually drawn. Starting with the map changed everything. Now when I say no, I know exactly what I'm protecting and why. Clean, direct, and it works.
I said no and didn't apologize once
Small on paper, huge for me: I turned down a family commitment last month with no apology and no offer of a substitute. The guilt-as-data versus guilt-as-manipulation section helped me tell which kind I was feeling. It was the manipulation kind, so I held the line. First time in years I didn't cave.
It actually addresses family, specifically
General boundary books read beautifully and then collapse the second I'm in a room with my actual family. This has dedicated sections for family systems, not vague 'relationships.' The prompts about my assigned role growing up were the ones that finally cracked it open. Practical where the others were theoretical.
Excellent, but it asks a lot
Some exercises surfaced more than I expected. I had to take three breaks during the values section because it made me face things I'd been dodging for years. That's the work — but pace yourself. The payoff is real if you're patient with yourself. Four stars only because it's more demanding than the cover suggests.
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